For Just for a Moment I Thought ...

Next month is our wedding anniversary.

We did the 'honeymoon' years. They were great.

Now we're at the 'real' years.

In all honesty, I can't remember the years that lie between. At least, not enough to give them a name.

Ah, the honeymoon years, when every night was frisky. When my panties and bras still matched. These days just finding clean knickers is a triumph.

The honeymoon years were also the 'wonder' years. Wonder, for wondering, not for wonderful. There was that itsy bitsy insecurity. You know, when you catch that flirtin' tart stilling a glance at your man? Guarding your territory, you quickly shoot a dagger-filled eye her way.

Heck, these nights, if a woman looked DH up and down, I'm likely to walk over, shake her hand and politely ask that she return him before work on Monday. And if there any of you [post-honeymoon] wives that think you wouldn't do the same, drop me a line and I'll personally send you a DVD of the original Stepford Wives. Oh. I kid. Not.

But the thing is we are real. We're real with each other. Any reader of my blog knows I'm a package with more strings than a ball of yarn. And DH, well, he can tie up a few all on his own. I'd say we're nearly meant for each other.

***

On Thursday DH came home clean and looking fresh with newly cut hair. Just a little out of character as his job entails playing in lyme and cement.

On Friday he announced he would be skipping his boys' pint night, rattling something about being busy. I nearly took his temperature.

Saturday morning came and DH announced he was taking the girls for a treat to their beloved "Ol' MacDonalds" for lunch so I could sew. Whaaaa?

That day I began to notice a strong smell of men's cologne.

Saturday afternoon he returned with flowers. I googled. I yahooed. I suspected a player.

Increased attention to his appearance. Check.

Breaks routine for no reason. Check.

Suddenly treating you extra nice. Check.

Brings you flowers for no reason. Check.

hmpf!

My head swirled with suspicion and that manky fragrance. I caught up to DH in the living room.

"Honey, don't you think you're wearing a bit too much cologne?"

"No, it's that damn air freshner you bought." Oh. (Who came up with these frickin' plugin freshners? And what fragrance did I buy anyway? Our's stinks!)

"And by the way," he said sheepishly. "I didn't go for my pint last night and seeing how there's a big football match on tonight, I'm going to the pub. Is that alright with you?"

So that was all it was. Saturday night was family night and the day's TLC was merely to get a pass. Be still my imagination.

Back to reality, I went right to my desk, took my roses and replaced the air freshner in the living room with them.